Top Twenty Lies by Young Faculties

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Although India-centric in places, this list is applicable elsewhere in the academic world.

  1. (sigh….) the true potential of my talents are realized only in a top research university in the west
  2. …and I don’t want to apply there because the weather there doesn’t suit my wife
  3. My research is top notch and is too “fresh” to be recognized and “cited”
  4. The Renowned Scientist in my field personally said “hi” to me at The Conference
  5. Due to the nature of my research topic, I require at least a crore (~ 200,000 US $) for experimental facilities to start my research
  6. (…and) my rejected proposal suggested very “fundamental” ideas, and fell in disfavor with the “practical” reviewers
  7. My department takes good care of all my academic needs and demands
  8. There is no hierarchy at my workplace
  9. I like being placed in multiple committees; it shows I am sought after by my colleagues
  10. I like to receive advice from my senior colleagues
  11. I love to work with and guide (advice or supervise) average students; that is the real challenge…
  12. I am not working for my tenure; I do it for the love of the profession
  13. The course that I am teaching is the one I always wanted to teach
  14. I love teaching…
  15. …in particular, UG kids
  16. (to students, especially UG kids) I am available anytime in my office
  17. I left a 100k (usually in US $) job elsewhere to do this…
  18. …and I never resented it.
  19. I am not bothered by my friend with an UG degree earning five times more than me
  20. This is a noble profession

[Tamil version]

— inspired by this list [via